Kendall has been spending a lot of time thinking about fictional birds and The Beatles recently. Big Bird, Roadrunner, Sgt. Peppers. What do all of these things indicate about his mental state right now? I have no idea — honestly, I think he’s just kind of a weird nerd.
In this episode, we get further confirmation that Greg is a slime ball just like the rest of 'em! Greg meeting with Logan and saying, “What do I want? I mean… what can I get?” is a perfect summation of his character. The guy snitched on Kendall and then decided to go team Waystar because he didn’t buy him a watch. All so he could… work for theme parks. Does he actually do any work at Waystar to earn his paycheck right now by the way? All he does is deal with family drama and I don’t think that’s in his job description?? To tell this to Tom, too, when he was forced to work on parks and hated it and would now probably love to just work for Brightstar as opposed to going to jail. Greg might just be the evilest one of all. At least the rest of them know when they’re being horrible, too! “I’m worried there will be… rough-jacks there to administer a beating” — worried about rough-jacks? You should have been worried about rough-Toms instead, am I right!? Kendall should not have underestimated his brother-in-law’s powers. What is it with the men on this show proposing in really gross and disturbing ways? “I’d castrate you and marry you in a heartbeat”... Have Tom and Roman been sharing notes? Fellas, if you didn’t know this already, bringing up castration in your proposal doesn’t work! Well, honestly, I guess it won’t get you engaged but it could get you something else you want.
Sadly Roman’s old tricks aren't working for him anymore though. Whoever this Laurie guy is better watch his back. Not just from Roman, but from me. I understand Gerri instilling boundaries but the tension is killing me. It seems like she doesn’t have a foot fetish, though, so we’ll see what Roman tries out next time. Even though he’s being incredibly annoying, you can tell she’s still slightly amused. She says his jokes “will kill us!" When “tattoo guy” turns into their “little secret," Roman is so pleased he agrees to drop it. Team RomanGerri forever. That is what I will be getting tattooed on my forehead.
Team TomShiv is not faring as well though sadly. The way Tom is obsessed with prisons it kind of sounds like he wants to go? Maybe don’t put that energy into the world, man. Try to manifest something good instead. We need to get Tom Wambsgans to follow @afffirmations on Instagram. Shiv can’t even properly comfort him because she’s so preoccupied with being undermined by everyone. I do feel sorry for her because people clearly don’t respect her, but her lashing out at her husband because she knows he will always be obedient is sad.
We finally meet Adrien Brody’s character, Josh, in this episode. I just have to say his kid is iconic for ruining his lie about her having a fever so he couldn’t leave his house by doing a full backflip into their pool. He is wearing so many layers but still finds it necessary to add a vest and scarf to his look. This dude really loves walking, too, which makes me know he’s absolutely evil. Nobody who is normal likes walking that much. His jaunt with Kendall and Logan (love the matching Joe Goldberg hats by the way) is possibly the cruelest thing I’ve seen on this show yet. He was trying to kill Logan slowly and in effect testing Kendall’s reaction to this event. When his father starts to get weak, he looks to Josh and tries to reassure him that the company will be okay rather than worrying about his father — Josh knows these two are not besties. He and Stewy meet up on the tarmac while Kendall watches like a kid stuck inside on a time-out. Who can blame Josh for going with Stewy, though? I, too, would make all of my financial decisions based on whoever is the hottest. By the way, when did they stop teaching kids that “everything everywhere is always moving forever”? Logan is a 21st-century philosopher and we need to give him credit for that. Sadly, he did not get any credit from Josh when he said he loved Kendall out loud and I know he has to be pissed about that. I feel for him though, I also really hate hills and cannot walk up them. I for one am never going to walk up a hill without ensuring a timely Evian is provided in case I am about to pass out.
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